Positive Self Image

Dear Self: You Are Enough

Self Confidence

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Dear Self: You Are Enough

As women, we tend to be our own worst critics. We scroll though social media and see everyone’s perfect family photos, their perfectly clean houses, and their perfectly captured moments and think, wow she is such a better mom than me. I could never do that craft, I could never have such a beautiful home, I could never get my kids to sit still for such great photos. And on and on and on. Why do we feel the need to compare ourselves to others? Why do we have such a negative view of ourselves? I am starting a new series all about combating negative thoughts and negative self-image. Starting with this first post: Dear Self: You Are Enough.

Negative Thoughts

If we allow it, negative thoughts will continually play in the background of our thoughts: you will never measure up, you will never have it all together, you will never look like her. This pattern is a dangerous path to follow. This negativity will weigh us down, depress and oppress us. We will begin to lack the motivation we need to be productive, and our relationships with our children, spouse, family, and friends will begin to suffer. Negative thoughts lead to negative actions and reactions, which lead to negative results.

Change our Thought Patterns

When we have a negative thought, we must dismiss it immediately and replace it with something positive.

Negative Thought: I will never measure up.

 Changes to: I will not compare myself to others. I am unique, strong, talented and successful in my own ways.

Tip: List your strengths, talents, and successes and refer to your list as often as you need to remind yourself how wonderful you are!

Negative ThoughtI will never have it all together.

Changes to: I have a plan in place to be as productive as I can be. Things are going to come up that I can’t change, but I can handle any challenge that is thrown my way.

Tip: Make a flexible productivity schedule that allows you to maximize your time and stick with it as much as you can. Evaluate you schedule often, what’s working well and what isn’t, and change it accordingly.

Negative Thought: I will never look like her.

Changes to: My body isn’t perfect, but I’m beautiful.

Tip: List the things you love about your body. Maybe it’s your hair, eyes, lips, whatever it is, make a list! Then make a list of the things you would like to change (your weight, your fitness level). If it’s something you CAN change, put the work in required to make that change, and feel good about your progress. Tough I know, but possible! If it’s something you can’t change, like your height, embrace it and learn to love it (and wear some heels!)

Negative Self Talk

If our thoughts are negative, our words will be too. From an early age, we are bombarded with images telling us how we should dress, do our make-up, what size we should wear. We must help our daughters (and sons!) see their beauty and worth is not found in such unrealistic places, and to do that, we cannot talk negatively about ourselves. If all we do is point out our flaws, our children will learn to do the same. Is this really what we want? We MUST choose to speak life with our words, especially about ourselves.

Quote Scripture

Just as we must change negative thoughts to something positive, we must also change our words. If you are having trouble coming up with your own, use the words your Creator has spoken about you. The Bible is filled with scriptures that will encourage and lift you up. Here are some of my favorites:

Ephesians 2:10 – For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Psalm 139:14 – I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Proverbs 2: 15-18 – She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are pleasant ways, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her; those who hold her fast will be blessed. 

Other Helpful Resources

If you are looking for additional resources for changing your thoughts and words, check out these wonderful books. Simply click on the image:

                

                

                 

Some of my other posts to help you cope with tough issues and live your best life:

How to Cope When Anxiety Threatens to Overwhelm You

When You Feel the Loneliness of Motherhood 

Dear Self: You Are Enough

My one hope is that this post helps you see just how fabulous you really are. That you start to believe: Yes I AM beautiful. I AM strong. Yes I AM talented. I AM Enough. I would love for you to hit share and send this to other wonderful women who needs to hear these words. Also, be sure to subscribe below if you haven’t already so you don’t miss the other parts of my Dear Self series, plus gain access all my FREE resources and future posts.

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30 Ways You Can Show Gratitude Every Day

Gratitude

30 Ways You Can Show Gratitude Every Day

In last week’s post The Benefits of Showing More Gratitude, I discussed why we should be living a life full of gratitude and how it impacts our outlook on life and our health. Practicing gratitude regularly is the key to appreciating what you’ve been given and what you’ve accomplished, while looking ahead to your goals for the future. This week, I’m going to share 30 ways you can show gratitude every day. As you continue reading, I encourage you to write down the ideas that speak to you. Then incorporate them into your day and watch how showing more gratitude can change your life for the better.

30 Ways to Show Gratitude

Begin With These

Write It Down

Number one on my list is to regularly write down the things you are grateful for. If we will take a few moments to write down the positive things from our day, we will go to bed focused on the good in our lives instead of the negative. If you are having a particularly bad day, I suggest going back and revisiting what you’ve written down from other moments to remind yourself that not all days are like this. It can help boost your mood. Use these questions to get you started:

  1. Who are you thankful for and why?
  2. What accomplishments are you most proud of?
  3. What special talents and skills do you possess?
  4. What are your most prized possessions?
  5. What are 3 things from today you are grateful for?

Be sure to join my 7 Days of Gratitude Challenge at the bottom of this post for more thought-provoking prompts!

Practice Self-Love and Self-Care

As moms, we tend to feel guilty when we take some time for ourselves. But why? Part of being more grateful is cherishing our unique gifts, abilities, and who we are as a person. And that means taking good care of what we’ve been given: our mind, body, and spirit. Life is much more enjoyable when we take the time to do the things we love and follow our passions. When we have more joy, we can to pass it on to those we love.

Here are a few ideas for practicing self-care:

  1. Read an inspiring book
  2. Take a walk
  3. Get a massage
  4. Go out with your friends
  5. Take a hot bath
  6. Practice Yoga
  7. Listen to your favorite music
  8. Take a nap
  9. Bake your favorite dessert
  10. Treat yourself to something you’ve been wanting

Turn Your Focus Outward

Express Gratitude to Others

After you’ve learned to have a more grateful attitude towards yourself, you can turn your focus to others. Think about the people in your life: your family, friends, spouse, co-workers, boss, and so on.  What have they done for you? How do they impact your life in a positive way? Once you’ve answered these questions, I challenge you to share your thoughts with them. There is no better way to show gratitude than to uplift and encourage others, especially those we love.

How to Show Gratitude Towards Others
  1. Give Your Time – Show others you care by actively listening to what they have to say and spend quality time with them by doing something together that they love, with no distractions.
  2. Show Appreciation – Give specific examples of the things they’ve done or said that you are grateful for.
  3. Be Thoughtful of Others – Be mindful of how your decisions affect others. Consider their feelings before you speak or take action.
  4. Extend Grace – We are not always going to agree with the behaviors of others. They will make bad choices and wrong decisions from time to time. It is important extend grace, when possible, because we all make mistakes.
  5. Show Affection – Affection is an important part of relationships, especially with our little ones. Holding and hugging them helps them feel safe and secure in our love for them. Regular affection also keeps us connected with our spouse.
  6. Celebrate Achievements – Offer sincere congratulations to those who have achieved something, even if you are not the winner. Give specific praise to your children and loved ones for their accomplishments to boost their confidence and self-esteem.
  7. Give Small, Thoughtful Gifts – Find a small gift your loved one would like? Give it to them to show you are thinking about them.
  8. Write a Note – A hand written note expressing gratitude to someone can be a very thoughtful gesture. It shows that you care and appreciate them.
  9. Support Others – Help those in need by giving your time and resources. Be someone they can rely on for support during difficult situations.
  10. Random Acts of Kindness – Go out of your way to do something nice for a complete stranger, such as paying for their meal or coffee.
  11. Tip Well for Good Service – When someone gives you good service, be sure to tip them well to show them how much they are appreciated.
  12. Donate to a Charity – Give to those in need by supporting local charities in your community.
  13. Smile – Something as simple as a smile will instantly make you feel better, as well as those around you.
  14. Say Thank You – Saying thank you shows appreciation to those who’ve done something for you, big or small.
  15. Visit With the Sick and Elderly  – Spend some time visiting those who may not have anyone else in their life. You could really brighten someone’s day.

What are your favorite ways to practice gratitude? I’d love to hear about them in the comments! Have you joined my 7 Days of Gratitude Challenge yet? If not, you can join below! It starts November 14th.

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