Positive parent and child relationships are one of the most essential parts of effective parenting. A positive relationship is the foundation upon which we can build trust, encourage honest and open communication, teach positive behaviors, and so much more. In this post, The Parenting Handbook: Developing Positive Parent and Child Relationships, I will discuss how we can create these kinds of bonds with our children.
The Parenting Handbook: Developing Positive Parent and Child Relationships
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How to Develop Positive Parent and Child Relationships
If you are looking for ways to strengthen your bond with your children, here are ten different strategies you can use to develop more positive parent and child relationships. You can also gain access to my FREE checklist (20 Positive Parenting Strategies that Work) by subscribing at the end of this post.
Communicate on Their Level
Connect with your child through age appropriate play, learning activities, games, or by teaching them something new. Quality time spent together helps strengthen your bond and opens the door to honest communication
Make One on One Time a Priority
If you have more than one child, it can be difficult to get uninterrupted time with each of your children. But I believe it is an essential part of creating positive relationships. Find a hobby you can enjoy together, go for a walk, go out for lunch. Anything that allows you to spend quality one on one time with each of your children. You can discover so much about their personality, strengths, and have genuine, thoughtful conversations about what is going on in their lives.
Get Involved in Their Life
I know we are all busy, but we must find ways to stay connected in our children’s lives. We should have regular conversations about what is happening during their days. We should be regularly communicating with their teachers and coaches, volunteering at their schools or coaching their team. What kind of friends do they have? Have them over to your home regularly to see what kind of influence they are. As our children get older, they may resent this level of involvement, but it is necessary to keep them on track and out of trouble.
Have Fun Together
We all want our children’s respect, but we must also have times when we can be silly and just have fun together. My dad always joked around with us and it’s those times I remember most fondly. So be sure to have fun with your kids and make memories they can look back on with a smile.
Our children need to know they can rely on us. If you say you will do something, do it. If your child tells you something in confidence, respect that (unless someone else is in danger). When they make a bad decision, they must face the consequences and take responsibility yes, but they also need support and love from us, no matter what. Let them know everyone makes mistakes, maybe even admit a few of your own, if age appropriate. If our children know they can trust us, they are more likely to confide in us.
Our children will face difficult situations from time to time, especially as they get older. It is during these times they will need our guidance and direction most. If they handle a situation poorly, discuss with them ways they could handle it differently next time. The key is giving them the wisdom and tools they need to handle future situations appropriately on their own.
Have Regular, Relaxed Conversations
Children, especially adolescents and teens, are more likely to open up in a relaxed environment. Try talking with them while riding in the car, cooking together, or taking a walk. It will also spark more conversation if you open up about yourself: your hobbies, interests, fond memories of your childhood, anything relevant to the conversation.
Listen Without Distractions
When our children are trying to have a conversation with us, we must do our best to listen without distractions. They need to know that we really hear them and care about what they have to say. If we are always half listening, there will come a time when they no longer try to talk with us. Even if it doesn’t seem very important to us, what they are saying is important to them. Remove any distractions, look them in the eyes, and really listen
Include Your Children in Making Decisions
Allowing children to be part of the decision-making process will increase their confidence and encourage independence. Younger children can weigh in on smaller decisions, like choosing what outfit to wear or what to have for dinner. Involve older children in more important family matters to show you respect their opinions.
Encourage Your Children to Face Challenges and Find Independence
When we have strong parent/child relationships, our children will feel empowered to face any new challenge that comes their way. When we show our support, we are pushing them to become more self-sufficient over time. This may translate into allowing your teenager to handle their own laundry or cook some family meals to ready them for college life. Or empowering your child to stand up to bullies. Empowerment happens through gradual instruction. Teach your child how to take on more demanding chores or tasks. Role-play with them through stressful social situations. Then, give them feedback to encourage future progress.
Revise Rules and Consequences When Needed
Rules and consequences should change as children get older. Children should gradually be given more freedoms, yet understand that increased privileges come with increased responsibility. They must also understand that increased responsibility leads to more significant consequences when rules are broken. Every child is different and can handle more freedoms at different stages in their life. Use your own discretion and decide when this is best for your child.
Resources for Positive Parenting
If your goal is to create a more positive relationship with your children and to learn more about positive discipline techniques, I encourage you to check out these resources on Amazon. Just click on the image to see the resource:
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Need advice for Positive Discipline Strategies? Check out my post: The Discipline Techniques That Really Work.
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